It’s strange how sometimes distant relatives who you’ve never met for more than a few hours before, and their little children who are your second cousins, can manage to make you feel more at peace and more loved than you can remember being in a long, long time – and all that within just three short days.

I truly feel blessed. As clichéd as that sounds, it’s true.

That little six-year old girl with the charming smile, shy eyes and Midland accent who softly announced that I was her best friend, who refused to sleep anywhere but in the same room as me, who couldn’t understand why I couldn’t visit her in England if she had come from there to see me, who let me brush out her tangles when she wouldn’t let her mother do that even, who asked me with all the seriousness of a youngster what I dreamt about, who replied with equal gravity when I asked her for an example that the best, and most reasonable dreams, were made up of fairies and castles and magic, who hugged me every five minutes with childlike innocence and wonder – it all seems terribly childish but it managed to create memories. Special bonds that mean the world. Even to me.

Her eight-year old brother secretly confided to his mother that he thinks I’m hot…reveling in that compliment might seem cheap, but it’s the first of its kind for me, so I’ll accept it very gladly – and abashedly even, for that seems the appropriate way to react :p At least the eleven year age difference is sufficient for me to be sure that the comment was honest, and held no ulterior motives. Or who knows? After all, I’m known to be highly paranoid at times..hehe.

And then there was the other little sister, exactly half his age, with her pixie face and mass of curls that I still can’t figure out how she could see anything through since they’re always cascading around her adorable face, set off by a pair of the most mischievous and laughing eyes that I’ve ever seen. Her indifference to her mother’s scoldings, her inability to stay still for a few minutes even, and her habit of smiling and laughing with every word she uttered couldn’t do any less than captivate the most distant stranger even! I spent half my time chasing her around the house, and the other half admiring her drawings of people with separate stories, each human being having been bestowed with merely a circle for a face, followed by two stick-figure like arms and legs, a nose and a smile…not once did it occur to that little devil that there was a thing known as a body to which all those things are normally attached :)

And then there were those hours spent laughing at li’l Sallu’s antics, trying to teach him how to say ‘khota’ (and succeeding once when I made him say it to my brother) without caring that the poor guy could only speak three words as yet, playing football with him with a tennis ball, being ashamed and delighted that at one year and three months he could kick more accurately than me (and my brain-eye-foot co-ordination is definitely not appalling…the kid was just way too good!), entertaining him with all sorts of bizarre items including anyone & everyone’s ‘chappals’, ammi’s glasses’ cover, his empty feeder, little toy cars, plastic bottles, wooden spoons, empty ice-cream tubs, trays with mangoes in them, then being astonished and proud of my own creativity when he enjoyed every single object we played with and rewarded us with toothy grins and baby chuckles filled with glee, laughing hysterically when four of us pelted the innocent child with sofa cushions completely baffling him and he apparently enjoyed the ordeal, taking pictures of all his frolics, watching him dance around with the older kids, to the beats of hindi music that I hadn’t heard before, looking absolutely adorable (so much so that I actually threatened to grind him and eat him up..haha), letting him hit me with a walkie-talkie and then with his bare hands just because he was enjoying it for some retarded reason that only babies can understand…and best of all, reveling in those few moments when he suddenly decided for no good reason to throw his little arms around my neck and bury his head in my shoulder in unmistakable and unconditional hugs that somehow managed to touch me more than any words could…

And after all those whirlwind hours of excitement and love, spending the nights deep in whispered conversations with Pari baji, wondering how it took so many years to actually get to know her – and know her SO well. It was one of those amazing connections that I thought I’d never make so quickly. I’ve never trusted someone within a few short hours of talking to them, but somehow it happened this time round. Hearing incidents from her own teenage years which had hurt then, caused by people who I’ve been hated by as well somehow helped to alleviate some of the pain which has seemed to be omnipresent in my life recently. The sting somehow became less sharp just by being able to see that somehow else had lived through things very similar…the feeling of being understood in that regard by someone I had always known technically but never practically somehow rose above the empathy of people who’ve known my plight even longer…hearing and sympathising with her own fears and secrets that she's never felt comfortable enough to share with her own siblings even, somehow made me feel worthy of being trusted again, something which no one has managed to do in months...and it made me feel human again.

It took only the days from Sunday evening to Wednesday morning to conjure memories that I sense will last longer – much, much longer. Even though I don’t really understand why they mean so much, because writing about it all hasn’t portrayed how I really felt…what’s inside is much more, and it isn’t explainable. But it’s still there. Surrounding me like a warm blanket on a cold night, sheltering me from the usual despair even though it’s for a short time…I want to embrace it for as long as I can. And even after it’s no longer comforting, I still want to be able to look back and remember it and savour all those emotions…for as long as I can. And I know I'll be able to do that.

Because just this once God is on MY side! :)